Ok, another "bucket list" mark off. Bake Christmas cookies. Real ones that you cut out shapes. Yes, that is correct, I have never made actual Christmas shaped cookies. So now they are in the refrigerator chilling. The recipe calls for three hours but a lady friend told me she only does it for 30 minutes, so I am compromising and chilling mine for 1 1/2 hours. I said I was baking cookies, I did not say they would be eatable!
So I started getting the ingredients out as the directions called for them. But when I started with the flour I suddenly remembered I hadn't wrapped my husbands gift and he was out picking up a few groceries, so I stopped what I was doing and got to wrapping his gift. After that was done I went back to the kitchen to proceed with the recipe when I realized I couldn't find the measuring spoons! I looked for sometime growing more and more frustrated, even looked in the closet where the wrapping paper was thinking perhaps I had left them in there when I grabbed the paper. No. Frantically I went back to the kitchen and remembered I had to heat the oven and there they were the whole time, on top of the stove. "Really" I muttered grabbing them and feeling quite stupid.
Proceeding with the recipe I went to the cupboard to grab the baking powder and didn't see it. So I checked in the refrigerator where I had kept it in the past and could not find it the refrigerator was so full. So of course the next step in the recipe was, clean out the refrigerator real quick so I could find the baking powder, a less full kitchen and few minutes later I still did not find the baking powder. Growing more agitated I went back to the cupboard and realized I had not bothered to look behind the spices where of course I found the baking powder. Feeling somewhat less agitated I went back to following the directions.
As I was putting in the ingredients I thought about my blog. I hadn't written in a while and I was due for a post. I wondered if perhaps I could share my baking experience as my last few posts had been so deep and serious. It was time for something light hearted. I continued to put together the ingredients and my thoughts starting running together.I decided I would relax when it came to my blog and allow the Spirit of God to guide my words After putting the doe in the refrigerator and sitting down to begin my blog I suddenly realized I was heating the oven too soon. Here I was feeling proud of myself earlier for remembering that small detail and had not thought about it heating for an hour and half. Oh well I forgave myself and shut the darn thing off. And here I am ready to begin this weeks blog.
It is funny how each of us have our own niche in life. Baking is not mine. Though I enjoy it, I find I enjoy writing much more. It seems more natural to me than trying to follow directions in a recipe and putting all the ingredients together. I do the same with my spiritual walk. I go from one book or person to another gathering all different views on who they believe God is and His will for us and trying to grasp the end result, faith. While I was baking I came to the realization that it may have been easier if I had gotten all the ingredients together first then start putting it together one ingredient at a time. What if I did this on my faith journey? Take it one piece at time and then begin putting it together. Step 1, pray. Step 2 read a spiritual book, maybe even the bible with an open mind? Step 3, sit back and think about what I just read. What did it mean to me? What could God be saying to me? As I was reading the Book of John I gave myself permission to underline and write my thoughts on particular verses that stood out to me. For the first time I was not afraid to be wrong. So what if what I thought in one verse would be proven wrong in a verse further on in the book? Isn't that what learning is about? Questioning, searching then deciding? It isn't like I am going to share these thoughts with anyone; this time my faith is between God and me, at least for now. I am trusting my Creator fully to guide me in my faith. Just as I believe my cookies will turn out delicious and full of flavor I believe my faith will turn out strong and full of inspiration!
When I embark on a new adventure or craft, I am never afraid to ask someone for their ideas or help. The same is true of this spiritual journey. Take this baking as an example. I shared what I was gong to do with a lady friend who had baked for many years. She shared what worked for her. Although I didn't follow her way exactly, I did take it into consideration and compromised. The same with my faith.
Now notice something here. I did not go to someone who had never baked for suggestions on baking. I went to someone who had baked for several years, someone who had positive results. The same goes for my faith journey. I do not go to people whose lives do not appear spiritual to me. They may talk about what they believe as people who never baked, may share what they believe I might try. No, I meet with those whose lives show God's love in the way they live and treat others. I go to those who have what I want in my relationship with God and in the way I want to live my life. I take what they share and I ponder on it. Then I come to some kind of balance that works for me.
Now, just because I try something a different way, like instead of the three hours the recipe calls for, I try thirty minutes as my friend suggested; does not mean my cookies will turn out good. I may find that the way she does it is the way that is right. Or perhaps the directions the recipe in the book says to do it would make my cookies turn out right. But I won't know until I try it out. Same with faith. What my Christian friends believe and share with me may turn out to be correct; or perhaps what my friends of other spiritual paths may be right. Then again, the "book" I read may turn out to be true. But in all cases, it is by searching, pondering and trying it out; living the way the book tells me, (following the directions), that I will find out what works the best, what makes better cookies, and what makes me a better person. A more joyful peaceful woman of the God of my understanding.
Well the timer went off a bit ago but I couldn't stop writing. So now I have chilled almost two hours. So I will go follow the rest of the directions and then come back to this post.
Now I know why I have never made Christmas Cookies. The batter was horrible. I got to wrapping presents and went past the three hour mark. When I could not get the batter out of the bowl I decided I didn't want to make them anymore so I threw it in the garbage. I don't enjoy all the work that goes into making little cookies that will be gone in no time and forgotten. Is this what my faith is like? When it takes up too much of my time or too difficult to understand I give up on it all together?
My friend that chills her doe for 30 minutes may just know what she is talking about. but I am not going to try it to see. I will just take her word for it.
Well, I am exhausted from all the preparation for the unbaked cookies, wrapping a bunch of gifts. The day is over and it feel wasted. Nothing to show for my efforts. At least I can see what I cross-stich. Lets just say baking Christmas cookies is not my thing. Now eating them, well that is another story! My thing right now is take a nap and then start on my cross-stitch.
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